the world is your acorn

We are off to check out the possibility of adopting this little guy:

Wish us luck!

My horoscope today:

Your likely life-partner will make an appearance soon. This is an excellent time to adopt a new look that emphasizes your uniqueness in the world. Conformity will make you blend too deeply into the background. Seek the bold.

ummm… my likely life-partner? Soon?! Look out, Little Red Haired Girl!

An email that I received today from a friend:

I was at this workshop last week called global beads.
We were given a box of like 100 colored beads in like 10 different colors. Each color represented a different racial/ethnic group. We were asked 25 questions and had to put a bead in a little clear box for the group that most represented our answer. Like, I am _(black)__. My immediate family is ___(black)___. Most of my friends are ___(white)__. Growing up from the ages of 0-10, my neighborhood was mostly ___(black)___. Anyhow, you get the point. At the end of the session, we were asked to describe our box in one word. My word was “white”. But, as I shook my little box around, in my sea of black & white there was one solitary, little yellow bead. It was you. Thanks for being my yellow bead.

We can dispose them for you! We are the proud new owners of a perfectly installed giant single basin sink (33 inches across is HUGE when there’s no divider in the middle) and the quietest garbage disposal I’ve ever heard. Things I’ve done include:

• Threw a squeezed lime wedge into the sink without a second thought.
• Washed dishes without scraping into the garbage can first.
• Soaked a 12 inch frying pan sitting flat in the sink.

As you can see, my life has changed. Now all I need is a puppy to wash in there, and all would be right with the world.

Asian people all over this country face an unnamed yet all-consuming frustration: Our chopsticks fall through the holes at the bottom of the utensil basket in the dishwasher.

Well, I assume that all Asian people have this problem. Maybe if I were more in touch with my people I might know how to handle it. For the past few years of renting apartments with dishwashers, I’ve just handwashed the chopsticks. It was a pain in the ass, and there were always chopsticks scattered around the bottom of the sink like so many pick-up sticks.

Now that we are homeowners, The Little Red Haired Girl and I have taken matters into our own hands. Growing up my parents put a little piece of screen window at the bottom of the basket, secured with twisty ties stripped of their paper wrapping. This was fine, but the screen got rusty. In the past few years I’ve noticed that they have some little piece of plastic mesh, but I never bothered to find out what it is or how they secured it. I figured that, instead of calling them and having to go through the requisite don’t-spend-too-much-money-on-new-housewares and spend-more-time-on-your-studies routine, I could probably just show up at Home Depot, explain what I need, and some knowledgeable sales representative would think of a suitable material.

Apparently a ridiculous assumption.

First we tried to ask the guy behind the paint counter, because he was the only sales representative in sight. He looked at us, then continued to putter around mixing paints while we stood there waiting for him to acknowledge us.

So we then walked over to the tool area where a guy pushing a little cart was lingering. I explained what we needed, and he suggested screen window material. I said I thought it might rust. He said that was true. He thought more about it, and said that screen window material would be great, but it would probably rust. I tried to be agreeable, saying that plastic would probably be a better choice. He then wondered out loud how we’d be able to secure something under the utensil basket, and I told him that I was thinking about using little plastic cable ties. He said that was a “good application.”

He then dragged us all the way across the store, pulling his little cart along, to the dishwasher salespeople. He explained what our problem was, and they said they didn’t have anything for that problem. He then ran away, leaving us with the dishwasher people, a young man and woman who thought that our problem was hilarious. They kept repeating to each other, “we don’t have anything that keeps chopsticks from falling through.” I explained what I was looking for again, talking them through the screen/rusting part of the thought process that seems to be a requirement for anyone encountering this problem. Then the young man called the millwork department to see if they had any plastic meshy material for us. He could barely contain his laughter while he explained. They had this gutter screen for $2. It’s not ideal, but we couldn’t be in there for another second. I cut it up and tied it to the basket as planned, and its little diamonds in combination with the existing little squares do the trick, although we have to make sure the chopsticks go in fat side down.

There must be a better way.

I just hosed a gaggle of little squirmy larvae out of our trash can. The previous owners left a big heavy can full of wet stinky nastiness, and since today was trash day, I figured I’d bite the bullet and take the hose to it before putting anymore larvae-feeding refuse in. Hopefully we won’t find the recycling bin in similar shape after the Curby truck comes next Wednesday. Yick.